Orient-ation

I packed up my suitcases this morning ready to change my accommodation. I’m moving to the Oriental Club for the next three nights, trading the cosy faded grandeur of the University Women’s Club, to something a little fancier. It’s still located in Mayfair but in an area that has a bit more life around it. I chose to walk between the clubs but regretted that decision fairly promptly. Manoeuvring two cases while using google maps to guide my path was a challenge. Here’s the exterior of the club:

The Oriental Club was founded in 1824 as a gentlemen’s social venue for those who had lived or worked in India. I started off with a good wander around the club, checking out all the spaces. It’s big - two bars, a large dining  room, a few drawing rooms and a billiards room. I’m not sure if I’m allowed to take photos here, so have sneakily snapped a few, manoeuvring my phone in my handbag so the camera is like a periscope. I feel like I’m in a spy movie and wish I had saved the spy lamppost story for today’s post. 

Venturing outside, I explored a bit of the surrounding area, which is very much a shopping district as compared to the residential area of my last accommodation Grays Antique Market was a good place to wander, although I have no requirement for a tiara or a giant silver epergne. It’s a complete maze in there and I definitely I missed some stalls and looked at others three times without realising. I think I’m tired! It’s a beautiful sunny day and there are crowds of people, and the chaos that goes with that. I was intrigued by an interesting section in Super Dry, a whole floor of second-hand vintage Ralph Lauren clothes, saved from landfill. Hundreds and hundreds of items for sale, all in colour and style groups, for example “blue vests”, or “green shirts”. 

Returning to the club, I took advantage of the lovely afternoon and headed to the outdoor terrace for a glass of wine. The terrace was full but inside in the Calcutta Lighthorse Bar was nice too. 

I’m struggling a bit today. Partially tiredness but also that disorientation that comes from new surroundings, new rules, the loss of the familiar. I was comfortable in my little safe haven at the UWC. I knew the people and the streets and how it all worked. I’m now in an unfamiliar environment, on my own, and feeling vulnerable. I’m an experienced traveller and I KNOW that I’ll settle in by tommorrow, but today…. today I’m fragile. 

I never know whether to include this stuff in the blog- it’s quite personal. I don’t want to make people uncomfortable or for them to be sorry for me. I much prefer to write about the interesting or amusing aspects of my travels. I’ve left it in to acknowledge that even I - extroverted, confident, experienced - have moments of uncertainty and doubt. 

I opted for an early dinner, in the Calcutta Lighthorse bar again as the restaurant was booked out for a function. The function crowd is currently having drinks on the terrace with an excellent Saxophonist playing. I’m having a daiquiri to lean into the summer vibe. The bar menu is mostly Indian menu, with a smattering of English items like potted shrimp and roast beef. I went for the “Vada Pav Burger”. A crispy, spicy Indian potato patty. It was good. 

The real win today is that my room has aircon, so I’m looking forward to a better night’s sleep tonight.

Cool Britannia

The weather has finally cooled down a little, which is a huge relief. I had a very light breakfast to leave room to try the pastries at the global winner of the  “top new bakery” category. Rich but delicious. 

I spent the morning in the National Gallery and the National Portrait Gallery, wandering, but with a particular focus on the Tudors and the Regency period. All the famous, recognisable portraits of the kings and queens are here, far more interesting in person than viewed digitally. When the brushstrokes catch the light right in front of you, it becomes easier to remember that the person in the portrait once posed for it, saw it, liked it, owned it. 

I skipped the traditional “masters” section of the gallery as I had been here before, many years ago with Jason and the boys. Sometimes those memories are lovely and sometimes they are tough. While I was perusing the museum gift shop I found myself gravitating to all the books Jase would have been buying with a bit of a lump in my throat. 

The galley buildings themselves are spectacular too. Britain does such an excellent job of collecting and displaying history. They create elaborate spaces that allow you to step into the story. I know that it’s a curated story, and that the curation may sometimes be controversial, but I think we can accept that fact while still allowing ourselves to step into the story. These spaces invite visitors to to appreciate a remarkable continuity of memory and identity. Walking back out into the busy streets afterwards, modern London seemed layered on top of everything I’d just seen, rather than separate from it.

After all the English culture, I was ready for lunch. If England does any food particularly well, it’s Indian, so I took myself off to Benares, a Michelin-starred Indian restaurant. It was fantastic. Just fantastic. There were three “street food” options, beautifully presented, followed by a tasting plate for the main course. It LOOKED like the food we get at home from the local Raj’s corner, but it was on another level altogether. 

The other wonderful thing that London does is support the arts. I hadn’t been organised enough to book tickets to any shows in advance but during dinner last night with a dear school friend and his son, we booked tickets for tonight to see The Devil Wears Prada musical. There were so many shows to choose from, many running for multiple years, still playing to full houses. The show was great fun, with excellent costumes and a live orchestra. The theatre was packed. Soho was still a hive of activity at 10pm when the show finished, and we had a very late after-show dinner before the boys walked me back to my club. 

Fun fact, there is a lamp post outside my club that was used by the KGB during the Cold War as a drop site. Agents would leave their documents behind a small door at the rear of the post, marking the base with chalk to indicate there was a message waiting. The British only found out about it in 1985. 

From the conversations I’ve had here, my sense is that many people in the UK are feeling the weight of economic and social pressures. As a visitor, what stands out to me is the extraordinary depth cultural history woven through the galleries, theatres, streets and traditions. I suspect that continuity will ultimately help to stabilise and strengthen the national sense of identity.  

Austen-tatious

This morning I set out to walk to the meeting point of a private Jane Austen/ Regency tour. I was to meet my guide at Kensington, so walked from Mayfair across Hyde Park. I expected to see a lot of people with dogs, but instead, the park was populated with people riding horses. I’m curious about the details - do they own the horse and stable it in the city? Do they rent the horse? I plan to do some google work later. Stopping at the rose garden to kill time (no one will be surprised I was running early), I was flagged down by an elderly Chinese lady, dressed to the nines. She had very little English but handed me her phone and pantomimed exactly how to hold it to take photos of her in a variety of poses. Then she INSISTED that I do the same while she took my photo, telling me “new pose, new pose”, and “you very good poser, very good”. Consequently I have ten or so ridiculous photos of myself in the rose garden. 

My guide Andreea was fantastic. Gentle, thoughtful and knowledgeable, we spent three hours together wandering through Hyde Park, Mayfair, St James and Covent Garden. We covered the houses, the elite gentlemen’s clubs, the regency shopping stops and the evolution from then to now. It’s interesting that practically and economically, the areas have stayed largely consistent- Bond Street in the Regency period was high end fashion, Bond Street today sports Channel, Dior and Rolex. Berkeley Square was a destination stop for carriages, today it’s the home of the Ferrari showroom. Today there was some kind of elite car event on when we walked past- twenty or thirty flashy cars parked outside with crowds checking them out. The square is also the home of Annabelle, purportedly the most difficult club in London to get in to. Photo below as the building frontage is very pretty. 

The planned afternoon of life admin was disrupted by a slight misunderstanding with the reception clerk. I asked about laundry and he directed me to a room with what looked like a washer/dryer. I happily ran a big bundle through the wash cycle, only to find that there was no dryer. Mayfair is clearly too flashy a neighbourhood to need a laundromat - the nearest one was a 45 minute walk away. Having already walked 17k today, I hailed a cab. Unfortunately, the shop had shut down, so we drove to the next option, which turned out to be a drop off/collection front only. I trudged another 10 minutes to the third option. Lugging a plastic bag of wet clothing around in this weather was not a highlight of my day. I did get to see a lot of interestingly dressed concert goers on my walk back though. There is a music festival in Hyde Park I walked past literally hundreds of young attendees dressed in what I would call goth style - it probably has a new name now. The thing is, tonight’s performer is Garth Brooks. There was not a cowboy hat in sight. I am completely intrigued. Photos of the Banksy statue that appeared overnight in Pall Mall, and fabulous choir that was singing in Covent Gardens as I walked past.

 

Sister Act

After a very hot sticky night, I gave up the attempt to sleep and went to sit in the library to figure out what I was going to do for the day. 

The weeks prior to flying out were ridiculously busy and I uncharacteristically have absolutely nothing booked or organised or even considered. I was feeling a little unsure about an unplanned week on my own- almost lonely. I didn’t get very far with the planning, and decided that coffee and breakfast might help me progress. I headed down to the dining room, which was filled with morning light, white tablecloths and the scent of toast. A delightful encounter with another diner set the tone for the day. My breakfast companion was a seventy five year old lady, overnighting in London before leaving for Oxford, where she is completing her Masters in British/Indian history.  She’s working for a historical society so thinks the knowledge will not be wasted. She spent time in Australia when her husband was working in the consulate. It was a fun conversation with an interesting, intelligent woman who was happy to share observations and opinions. I felt better about my week, remembering that companionship comes from unexpected places. 

Returning to my room, I found a message from Lily, my new acquaintance from the night before, inviting me to lunch at the Oxford and Cambridge club. I walked there via a meandering tour of Mayfair, possibly not the best idea as it’s still scorchingly hot and I was wearing a fancy outfit to comply with club rules. I did a quick run through Fortnum & Masons. Here’s a picture of the doll house made entirely of biscuits. 

The club building was palatial with three libraries (with room plaques like “the South Library”), four different drawing rooms, squash courts, a snooker room, a bar and an enormous dining room. Large portraits of various Dukes and Earls looked down on us, probably disapproving that women can now enter the hallowed halls. Lily is in her 30’s, Jewish, American and well travelled with a healthy curiosity and quite strong opinions on most matters. We had no awkward conversation gaps! The lunch was fantastic. She’s happy to share food so we both were able to try a few different options. We then moved to one of the drawing rooms where we were joined by Lily’s friend, an IP lawyer focused on sustainability. Both girls have recently finished study and shockingly to me, neither can find a job. Two bright, articulate, interesting young women. They were both feeling a little grim and hopeless about the situation. This was my moment to give back, and I’m hoping that after a cocktail and a pep talk both of them have a few new strategies. 

By the time I arrived back in Mayfair, it was almost time for my evening activity, a wine club night at my accommodation. What fun. Ten women, a wine from the Loire Valley with matched food, and collegial conversation. We sat on the terrace, cooler due to the shade of the plane tree and chatted through topics that ranged from Oscar Wilde to Greek cooking. 

I’ve been reflecting on the connections today. The genuine interest and acceptance and ease of conversation that can occur with little effort. I’m grateful today for the easy generosity that women give to each other. 

On a less positive note, I had a go at using AI to think up a title. This is the first time I’ve tried it for this purpose. Never again. I gave it my post and asked for title suggestions. I am horrified by the misogyny that lurks in the algorithm. Here are the suggestions: 

“Tea truth and tenderness”, “Soft hearts, sharp wits”, ”We go together like gossip and wine” and “Life’s warmer when you’ve got women” . Revolting.  

Book-end

Today is my last day in Oxford for this part of the trip. I woke up early to find an active family chat going on about the soccer. Cam and Claire are actually in San Francisco at the game and posted some good live photos. I loved sharing the experience with everyone even though we were in three different time zones. As I checked out, I was gifted with a free Oxford fridge magnet from the hotel guy who sorted the early check in. Despite the basic rooms, the service at the hotel has been brilliant - very friendly and helpful. 

The programme directors chose to end the week with a technical, data heavy session covering financial management and board responsibility. It was dense but excellent. About a quarter of the room is sick - coughing, sneezing and blowing their noses. Coincidentally (or perhaps not), they are all seated on one side of the room. Those of us on the other side are staying well clear. I’ve clocked who is sitting over there and am avoiding them, even in the breaks. 

The last day of a course always feels sad. Packing, saying goodbye, wrapping up the week. We finished off today with a feedback session and a certificate presentation. Waaay too slow and boring when we knew there was a tasty lunch upstairs and trains to catch. Unfortunately the trains were very easy to catch, as they were cancelled and/or late. Standing on the platform in a crowd in the sun made me rethink a few life choices. Apparently the roads are congested too, so maybe a Uber wouldn’t have been much better. I arrived in London to find it even hotter than Oxford. The cabbie’s car thermometer showed 37 degrees. I’m staying for a few days at the University Women’s Club in Mayfair. It’s a heritage building (1876) and lovely, however to my horror, I’ve discovered there is no air conditioning. I know this is typical in England, and I specifically booked a hotel in Oxford with aircon, but somehow this detail escaped me for my London stay. I’m absolutely melting. 

This part of London is packed with familiar references from decades of reading. All the regency novel streets are here - Grosvenor square, South Audley Street, and the club building was actually used as a setting in a book by Dorothy Sayers, one of my favourite authors. In my wanders, I found a little pocket park, an oasis of green, beautifully cool compared to the streets, with people relaxing on the grass and reading on benches. I considered sitting a while but the temperatures drove me back to the club, where I discovered that, coincidentally, there was an Oxford Alumni event in the club library that evening. What are the odds that I leave Oxford and land in London at an Oxford event. Disappointingly it was a pretentious and boring crowd, and the wine was awful but it was nice to do something social and I met an interesting girl who invited me to dinner later in the week. Hoping for cooler weather tomorrow! 

 

rare AIr

A good day today, with the tension from yesterday dissipated. Maybe everyone just needed a good sleep. Many of the group are following the World Cup (the Ghana crew were SO ecstatic when they drew with England) and there have been late nights in the pub for some to watch the games. The programme director starts each day with a question about the highlights from the day before, hoping for feedback on content. Invariably, the first response is about highlights from the soccer matches played overnight. The programme content for today centred around AI possibilities and threats. There are a few heavy hitters in the room for this topic and they stepped up to share their knowledge. The takeaway? That  unplugging your system is still the key crisis response. We have people running security for global banks in this room, and while I’m oversimplifying it, if a world wide system gets hacked, our best response is still to pull the plug.  

For our last evening together, there was a formal dinner at Christchurch College. Christchurch is one of the larger, fancier colleges. It’s a breathtaking venue, founded in the 1500s when Henry VIII was breaking up with Rome. There are a couple of original portraits of him hanging on the walls. It’s steeped in history but also very much alive with a Great Hall of long wooden tables, high ceilings, portraits staring down… and scruffy students stealing our prosecco as they walk by on the way to dinner. The prosecco was pretty ordinary, so in my opinion they were welcome to it. The food in contrast was actually really good and beautifully presented. Fun facts, gleaned from the pre dinner speech: Lewis Carroll taught here, first telling Alice’s in Wonderland stories to Alice Liddell, the daughter of the Dean. It’s also produced an unusually high number of British Prime Ministers.

There was an orgy of photo taking, with various “groups” , ranging from “Asia Pacific” to “tall people” to “old white men”. A few competitive souls made every effort to be included in as many groups as possible, with ever more ridiculous justifications of why they fit in the category. 

This is just a short update today as I have to pack. I’ve included more photos, and you can see the Henry VIII portraits in a couple of them and the “Asia Pacific” three. 

The Art of Fugue

In a change of format today we broke into small groups and discussed a case study, looking at a specific corporate failure to consider the reasons for the failure. We are mid-course. At a basic level, one could say that the sustained pace, along with the unrelenting heat has frayed a few tempers, however the underlying reason for the tension is a little deeper. We have quite differing cultural norms for group behaviour, and at the risk of generalising or stereotyping, I’m going to try and explain this further. Our Nigerian cohort members hold the floor for quite a long time when they communicate. There is a context setting part, then an opinion, then justification for the opinion. It’s very interesting, but it takes a long time, and they engage on almost every topic, so dominate the room. Our Eastern European cohort members communicate more shortly and sharply, interrupting, a lot, to clarify or focus the discussion on the main point. You can see where this is going….there was a fairly heated fight in my small group today… This small group tiff is representative of a broader tension in the wider group, and I’m finding it harder to learn in that environment. 

Tension aside, some of the topics today were really interesting. We had a behavioural economist talking about risk, starting with a discussion about why lottery tickets are so popular and then delving deeper and deeper into what makes people take risks. We had a fantastic lady who was the deputy governor of the bank of Ghana and a senior leader in the IMF (International Monetary Fund). Her talk was about emerging markets and she had an amazing ability to marry the perspective of the regulator with the perspective of the organisation. I know that sounds dull, but it was really really good. Also, she was an absolute master in managing the room and ensuring that quieter cohort members had input, and the more dominant ones were muted.

They had organised a weird “international festival” for lunch today. The unfortunate catering staff were in little booths outside in the courtyard in 35 degree heat, with sad, dodgy signs saying “Mexican” or “Lebanese” . We lined up in the sun to collect our international lunch/s of choice and then stood awkwardly balancing plate and cutlery and drink. It was purportedly a World Cup inspired idea, but the food options were not necessarily countries in the comp (looking at you Italy). It was one of those ideas that was probably better in concept than in reality and I couldn’t help looking longingly at the beautiful, air conditioned, comfortable space we could have sat down in just fifty metres away through a locked door. 

Our evening activity was a walking tour of Oxford. Unfortunately, we ended up with the most boring tour guide on the planet. I had told a few of my group that the walking tour would be great, and felt very badly that I had talked it up. Dinner at the Crown afterwards was fun though. We had a diverse group from Poland, Hong Kong, Croatia, and Czech Republic and we ended up talking about social policy. This dinner included my favourite conversation of the course with our Hong Kong friend coaxed into talking us through the cultural differences between Hong Kong and Mainland China and his take on global politics. There are no Americans in the cohort, but obviously the US leadership behaviour impacts everyone, so the conversation often strays to that impact. He told us that “the US leader is consuming his own fortune and the fortune of his descendants”. I don’t want political comments on my social media (take the hint blog commenters!),  but it was such an interesting idea and way of describing the behaviour. I’ve been thinking about it ever since. 

What stayed with my most today was the difficulty inherent in listening to a variety of separate voices. Individually they are coherent, but each voice feels a little out of step with the others. It was real work to understand  the larger picture made by the friction and the differences. I would like it to be easier and simpler but… learning happens in discomfort so I’m trying to learn. The title is a nod to my thinking that simple harmony doesn’t require you to listen so carefully or for such a sustained period to derive meaning.  I’m trying to listen to many things at once to understand patterns and fully appreciate the beauty of the complexity.